My Idiot
by Effervescent Passion
Summary: One-shot:: He was a serial killer, a liar, and so much more. But, of them all, he was mostly an idiot. My idiot. BeyondxOC.


Sup ya'll. Tis is Misha, FINALLY BACK, with a one-shot. Yes yes, I should probably be writing another full story soon, but I'm so lazy man. I don't know if I have the patience to finish it from beginning to end. Hence why I wrote this instead.

I wanted to try writing a sort of angsty, although in the end, it's not really that sad nor emotional. Eh...oh well. I tried. Truth be told, this story features not one of my main OC, rather, the sister of one of my OC's that I wanted to write about for Death Note. Well, if I EVER get started on that story, this would make a pretty good prologue for that story.

I'll stop rambling for now. For more info, read the footnotes.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Death Note. End of story.

* * *

**My Idiot**

_ And I know what you want, and I know what you need_  
_ But I'm goin' screw it up, yeah_  
_ Cause I'm an idiot, and I'm your boyfriend, yes I am_

-Idiot Boyfriend by Jimmy Fallon

* * *

He was an idiot.

A sick, sick idiot.

An idiot I chose to love in the end.

How I learned to love him, I will never know. He was an idiot, simple as that.

My idiot.

My idiot.

My idiot.

I wasn't very old when I found my way to Wammy's house. Turned thirteen that year. My sister only seven. We ran away from our parents. My parents never were good parents, simple as that.

Continuing on.

We were just wandering around, my sister's hand in mine. We walked through a forest you see, and stumbled across a strange building. It was certainly fancy, if I do say so myself. I found myself staring at it lustfully, jealous that whoever lived there was certainly lucky. It was very big, and had a beautiful garden. Who wouldn't want to live there? I swear I was staring there, for at least a good ten to twenty minutes, my sister's eyes also in awe.

But then, my sister screamed.

Someone's hand was on her shoulder.

It was a boy. He looked around her age or so. A blonde kid. He stared at her for a decent ten seconds before asking who we were. His hair was cut into a neat bob, brown eyes, and his face blank. But, honestly, my first impression of him wasn't so great. The first thing he said to us was:

"Who're you? Hobos?"

Boy, was I ever angry. I mean, honestly? Who in their right mind would say something like that? Where was the "hi?" I certainly didn't like him at first, to tell you the truth. Sure our clothes were pretty dirty, and we didn't look exactly the best, that was no excuse for that kid to say that right off the bat. As you can probably guess, I was pretty pissed. But, as time went on, this kid, his name Mello, became good friends with my sister.

Oh, I'm getting sidetracked again. Well, going back to what I said about arriving there.

You see, Mello brought us to meet the owner of that fancy house after I gave the kid a good beating (don't ask.)

Anyways, back to the building, the owner of the fine facility was an old man named Quillish Wammy. Now, boy, he was awfully nice. The first thing he asked for was our past, told us this was an orphanage, and even offered to let us in. It was pretty sudden, so it took awhile before I processed what he said. Of course I was pretty sceptical, and asked so many questions, eventually, we accepted, naturally. We were starving and cold at the time. All I could do is hope the place was safe. My sister deserved that.

Well, the place looked pretty good.

The funny thing is though, he told us to think of a nickname, an alias. He never mentioned why, but we thought of one anyways. He asked for my first name, and never bothered for the last.

Our names? Lucilla and Lucille. My name the first.

We spend an awfully long time thinking of a name and eventually came up with one. Like our actual names, they sounded pretty similar.

My alias? Rina. Lucille's? Rini. Well, we are sisters after all.

Mr. Whammy gave us a bedroom immediately, saying we'll share one, as sisters. I was more than happy, of course. We were able to live under a roof. I'm more than happy for that.

Our room was big, well, big enough. I was more than satisfied. Heck, we got our own beds! They were warm and comfortable... They were perfect.

The next day was weirder. We were introduced to the other orphans of the institution immediately the next morning. We met them, and even went to school, really, really, awkward. It was so sudden for the two of us. I mean honestly, the day before, just randomly, we wandered around and managed to stumble our way to the place. Pretty lucky, but at the same time, pretty…rare for a person.

Now, back to the school. Lucille and I were separated into different classes, naturally, due to our age gap. I ended up with the older kids, their eyes staring. I was creeped out that day. One of the strangest days in my life actually. I gave an introduction about myself, with the other kids asking me questions about myself. But truth be told, the freakiest thing was that each and every student at that place was incredibly smart beyond belief. It was pretty hard to catch up, if you get my drift.

Lucille was happy at least. It wasn't long until she made friends. Well, she made friends the day we were introduced to everyone. There were two she was particularly close to.

Oh my god.

Lucille…I was pretty surprised to say the least.

Her two friends were both guys, and were both slightly older than her. Worse part is, they were the bullies, the rebels of the school. The troublemakers. At least one of them was. It was that rude boy, Mello, the kid we met when we found this place. Oh, I was surprised when my own sister befriended him and his best friend, Matt. Oh why did you have to pick a guy like him over others?

At least Mello never bullied my sister, that was good. I would've blown a fuse if that happened. I guess that's cause he liked my sister, same goes with Matt. Well, at least I think so. Well, I liked Matt better but, eh, I'm not fussy. As long as she liked him back, then it's all good.

Still, I would've preferred her to befriend a few girls. I mean, she should grow up like a normal girl, not that I'm saying there's anything wrong with befriending a guy. After all, I did the same thing as her.

Yes, the first friend I made was also a guy

His name? B. Beyond Birthday in full.

He was pretty cute. I loved the black hair that stuck out in every direction possible. The way he looked at people was strange though, as if he knew peoples darkest secrets or whatever, pretty creepy actually, but it never bothered me too much. Oh! And there's the jam.

Strawberry jam, his favorite. Kinda cute again.

He was like a kid, in many ways. Maybe that was why I was attracted to him. His kid-like expressions. He was pretty much a kid at heart.

Well, I can't blame him.

He was my idiot after all.

My BB.

My Beyond.

Then I met L. Honestly, I was surprised. He looked exactly like Beyond. Pretty scary if I say so myself. I learned B wanted to be L, courtesy of himself during L's visit. That explained why they looked so alike.

L was okay. He was just...okay. I guess I was too into B to care so much about L, though everyone else was all over him. He wasn't much older then me, but oh so much smarter. I guess that's why he was popular. But honestly, there were so many times when I felt the need to slap him hard across the face, just because he always acted like a know-it-all.

I never found the courage to do that.

My sister liked him though. Not as much as B, cause she considered him like a brother since I spent so much time with Beyond. Beyond liked her back, like a sister. I was happy. Does that mean he liked me? As a sister, or something else? I hoped for the latter, of course. I liked B, and wanted love back.

I could never tell what B was thinking though. His facial expressions lacked variety, and there's the fact I've never seen his blush before…or at least around me. Regardless, I still liked him.

I just decided not to show it out in the open too much. I kept it pushed away for the most part.

Until a few years later though.

One day, he raged. He told me he as running away, all because of L. He was furious, his eyes deadly. I didn't know what to say to him. He asked me to keep it a secret from my sister. I didn't understand why but obeyed. This was a week before he ran.

Six days later, he was about to goodbye. He kept telling me about how he hates L, what he was gonna do, and how he'll miss me. I stared at him, before it finally clicked in my head: He wanted me to go with him. Was that a sign that he liked me?

Well, I'm pretty sure I blushed like crazy that day. I was love-stuck and was an idiot, like him, naturally. When you fall for an idiot, you become an idiot yourself. So it turns out, I ran with him, and never bothered to say anything to my sister. I left a note however, on our desk, saying, _"I'm sorry,"_ followed by my name, my real name, Lucilla. I felt sorry, scared, and even cried a little. I swore to myself to protect her...but I broke my promise and left her to fend for herself, all because I loved a boy. Well, I was an idiot, like I said earlier.

We both were. B and I.

That's the way it was always going to be, especially with someone like him.

We spent our time, running from place to place. I followed, because I believed in Beyond with all my heart. I knew he was going to take me somewhere safe...or at least I thought so.

Well, in the end, turns out that was a mistake...a bad mistake.

During that time we were on the run, I knew nothing. I suspected nothing. I merely followed, like I stated earlier. I guess I was blinded by my love, even though I doubt he felt the same.

"I love you." He would say.

Maybe that was the truth.

Maybe that was a lie.

I knew nothing.

He took me place to place, the two of us constantly on the run around the city of Los Angeles. He never told me why we kept running. Just that we needed to move...constantly.

I never questioned why.

Maybe that was why I never knew anything.

Maybe I simply believed in him too much.

Oh...I admit, I was a stupid fool...a love-stuck, silly, fool.

Even after seeing those newspapers, the ones with all the terrible murders of people, I suspected nothing.

Those poor victims I thought at the time, nothing more.

Little did I know my ignorance was going to cause me pain later.

Even though he was always asking me to go buy supplies (which were fairly suspicious, thinking about it now), and to make little dollies for him, I still suspected nothing.

I wish I could kill myself for my ignorance.

I wish I knew.

I wish I wasn't so blind.

Why did he always sound so innocent and persuasive in his excuses? Why is it that everything he said sounded perfect, no matter how suspicious, or indifferent I felt?

Let me tell you a "story."

One day, I was out buying supplies for B (and jam); a tall man in black approached me.

"Are you Lucilla Chaisty?"

I was surprised, obviously, since I'm sure very few people knew my name, my real name, but answered anyways. Well, he looked important. I've always been taught to tell the truth in difficult situations, although this wasn't really a life-or-death situation….yet. I didn't know to answer a yes or a no, so I merely spoke the truth. Immediately after I answered, he said something about the police or a secret agent, and whisked me away before I realized what was going on. I was brought into a black car of some sort and found myself ten minutes later, amidst in a fancy hotel of some sort.

Okay, so there I was, sitting on this couch, looking around because I wasn't really sure what I was supposed to be looking at. A minute later, I heard the sound...of chewing?

Turning my head towards the direction of where the chewing was, I found myself staring at B. Wait, scratch that. I've been spending so much time with B that I had forgotten about the "other."

It was...well... L.

L as in the man B hated but aspired to be.

His swivel chair spun around facing me. His face startled me at first, simply because I felt the need to scold B at his terrible posture...but remembered again that this wasn't B. I kept my mouth shut luckily. It would've been so embarrassing if I called out the wrong name.

L stared at me for what felt like a good five minutes. Err...well, he wasn't entirely staring. He spent some decent time eating his cake, his fork held strangely, just like Beyond did (or rather copied.) Finally though, he finally spoke.

"Rina...was it?"

I gulped once quickly and nodded nervously. I was afraid, simply put. No, not of all, but of what would happen if Beyond found out. I'm sure I'd be screwed. After all, Beyond hated L's guts.

"Well Rina, is Beyond with you?" L spoke with a slightly bored tone, just like B. Although confused why he would ask, I nodded anyways. "And where is he?"

I blinked. Although be said only few words, it seemed awfully nosy of him. Wasn't L supposed to, well, not give a crap about B? He never did, if I remember correctly.

"...why?" I asked back, completely confused.

"Just answer, please. Don't worry, I won't send anyone after him. Just wondering how he's doing. He did run away with you right?" I swear I heard him say something else after that though, all hushed up. I think it was a "not yet," after the 'I won't send anyone after him.' I wasn't not positive however, so I ignored it.

Although I paused, I had no idea what I had gotten myself...and him into. "Home." I said silently, just barely audible for him to hear.

"Out of curiosity, has the two of you been running around every few days, moving here and there before you even got he chance to settle in?" L started to poke his fork into his cake.

"...how did you know?" I was surprised. Was L stalking us?

"A guess." He shrugged. "Has...anything strange happen recently?" His dull eyes stared holes into me. I felt timid...despite my usual outlandish personality. L was truly a force to be reckoned with. Just looking at him scared me...but that may be because he looked just like B...my Beyond.

I felt my eyebrows rise as I stood up. "I'm sick of these questions. Why the hell do you need to know? Stop asking questions about our private life! It's none of your business!" I slammed the table in front of me. I was slightly pissed. Though he looked like B, there was no reason to ask about my private life. Yes, maybe I was overreacting, but honestly, his questions pushed me too far.

He sighed once. "You really don't know, do you?"

"...what?"

"The reason behind your constant coming and goings, the reason why he's always not home, the reason why he doesn't talk to you as much anymore."

I stopped and felt my eyes widen. I sat back down and tightened my fist, letting my mouth speak before my mind. "How...the hell do you know...that he doesn't talk to me that much anymore? Or rather, any of this? Are you stalking us?" Oh, I was furious. So furious in fact, I would've tried to knock him out right there, but managed to suppress the need in the end.

He paused for a minute. The silence was deafening.

"I'VE HAS ENOUGH OF THIS." Yelling, I slammed the table once more, glaring at L.

He put his plate down, done his cake. "...let me tell you something."

And he said it.

Everything.

About B.

About his secrets.

About why we were running.

About his recent strange behaviour.

About why he made minimal contact with me, though taking me with him on the run.

Stuff I didn't know.

Even about the stories of the recent murders.

He connected everything…

To B.

B….?

I had L stop mid way in describing the death of a little girl named Quarter Queen. ...After all, my sister was around the same age as her.

Was L lying? Or had I been lied to all his time? By him? By the man I loved?

There's no way B could do things like that either! Murder? Out of the question! B...he was kind...wasn't he?

I mean….there was no way. Beyond…there was no way he could murder anyone….right? Beyond couldn't do that, there was absolutely, positively, no chance of that. I mean, bullshit! B wouldn't...he promised. He couldn't have the heart to kill anyone.

I fumed on the couch for a decent ten- twenty minutes, L staring at me as if he was waiting for me to calm down, this time drinking a cup of tea or coffee. I spent a decent time thinking about what L had told me before it finally hit me.

...B...

...he lied to me.

...again.

He really did do those things...those things L just told me earlier. About Believe Bridesmaid, Quarter Queen, and Backyard Bottomlash (although he never got to describe her death.)

That's why we kept running.

That's why he kept telling to make those straw dolls, which would mysteriously disappear forever after I finished making them.

Why he made me buy so many strange things all the time.

Why...he stopped talking.

I cried.

I cried there. The tears rushed out of my eyes. I couldn't stop crying either. I just kept staring at L, imagining he was B. The same B I trusted with all my heart. There was no way I could go home now. I was upset, with B, no, with myself. How blind I was. How I couldn't see this. How I never suspected anything to the end.

In the end, I was the biggest idiot of all.

Fuck.

I hate you Lucilla Chaisty.

So much.

Awhile later, the tears finally stopped. I rubbed my eyes and stood up, straightening my body up. I was just about to leave when L stopped me by calling my name.

"Before you leave, I have something for you."

He handed me a blue envelope, a dark blue envelope. "For me?" I asked. L nodded. I peered at it awkwardly and opened it carefully, curious of the sender.

The letter was a decent length, in neat writing.

To: Rina

Hey! It's been an awfully long time since I've seen you. How are you? Well, L told me to keep it short, so I think I'm supposed to get to the point.

Are you well? I've still here studying hard, with Mello and Matt of course. It's fun here everyday, because these two are always making me laugh. Oh, I made a new friend...somewhat. His name's Near. He's real quiet, but kinda cute. Come home soon okay? I want to introduce you two, and as well, show you how much I've grown. I have something for you when you come back. I think you'll like it.

If you want to say your sorry, forget about it. I know you're happy, that's what matters. I miss you a lot. Come home okay? Soon.

Say hi to B for me okay?

-Lucille (Rini)

...Lu...cille.

...my sister...

The very sister I ditched to follow the boy I thought I "loved."

"...when was this written?" I asked L, tears filling my eyes again.

"Not too long ago." He answered. I felt my heart ache. Lucille...I left her alone...my little sister. My family.

"...does she know?" I asked once again.

He nodded.

I cried...again.

The tears were different this time. It wasn't me feeling betrayed, I felt like I betrayed my sister. I was the betrayer, not the betrayee.

However, instead of waiting for me to stop crying this time, he said something.

"Your sister cares a lot for you. She says follow your heart." Even though his voice lacked emotion, I could feel the sincerity from my sister emitting from him. I knew what he said was true though. That sounded like something Lucille would say, making me laugh for a brief second.

I missed her.

Truly.

Then…I went home. I said no goodbye. I simply left and returned home. My sisters letter in hand.

B was home when I opened the door to our apartment. He asked where I was. I had to lie. I felt nothing out of it…simply because he lied to me for so long.

I should've felt hurt, betrayed and all that other stuff, but said my response with no emotion. "I made a visit to the bookstore and read up on this magazine. I lost track of time, I'm sorry."

He said nothing back. Instead, he noticed the letter in my hand and snatched it quickly. I made no effort to take it back. He seemed to read it before handing it back to me. "Where'd you get this?" He asked, his tone slightly angry. Did he suspect me of lying already?

"None of your business." I answered back simply.

"Tell me!" He urged on.

"No thank you."

"Spit it out!" He growled this time.

I bit my lip. "Fuck no! Go away! B, just leave me alone!" I screamed back in response. I balled my fists tightly to the point where my knuckles began to hurt. He stared at me for a few seconds before turning around, his hands in his pocket, back hunched over.

"So be it."

And he left the apartment.

He didn't return.

At least, not when I was home.

I didn't even hear from him at all.

Not until a few days later...where the final "murder" was about to take place.

B...

B tried to kill himself.

L had called me that day...the day he tried to suicide. His voice was urgent, asking if I had seen B anywhere that morning. Of course I answered a no. I hadn't seen him at all ever since we had that spat with each other.

Well, I won't bother with the details. He got arrested, if that was anything compared to the injuries he had. Besides, L didn't really tell me much. All I was told was that he tried to burn himself in the fire. Nothing more.

I went to see him; a week after the arrest, with special permission from L.

We couldn't meet face to face however, simply because his face was so badly burnt in the fire. There was a wall between us, with an opening so we could hear each other's voices.

I still remember the first things we said to each other.

"...Beyond?" I called out to him, hoping he would answer back.

"Lu..." He croaked out, his voice barely audible. "cil...la." He called out my name. Not Rina…my name. It made me feel warm. He hasn't called me by my name nor alias for a long time. I almost forgot I even had a name.

"How are you feeling?" I almost asked him if he was okay, but stopped realizing there was no way he was okay.

"Ri...na." He called my by my alias name this time.

"Yeah?"

"...I'm sorry... For ignoring...you." His voice seemed sad. I forced tears to not fall.

"I forgive you."

"I'm sorry...you have to...see me...like this."

"It's okay."

"Lu...cilla. I'm...sorry."

That's all I remember.

I spent the next year and a half visiting him. We made up during this time, although his condition never improved dramatically. Doctors said it could take forever to fix him, more than a few years. I was willing to wait patiently for him, even though I knew he was probably going to be condemned in prison even after he was better.

Although I was so angry with him for lying to me…I easily forgave him.

He sounded so sincere with his words after the incident, it was as if he regretted everything that happened during the time when he murdered people.

Everything.

Why did I stop visiting him though?

He died. From a heart attack. No idea why, but he's dead.

I cried that day, more than any other time. More than when I left home with Lucille, more than any other time in general.

I'm not angry however, at his death, because I know that's probably his punishment for his past misdoings. I'm not going to cry forever about his death either. He deserved it. I know.

But…even so…

I loved B.

And B loved me.

Nothing else mattered more.

In the end, I got my wish.

That means I got a happy ending, right?

I mean, all I ever wanted was to be loved by the man I loved.

And it came true.

So that's my story in short.

There is no start.

Nor is there an end.

My life revolved around a serial killer.

A serial killer I loved and hated.

...Life was just too cruel sometimes.

I have one more thing to say before the story of my life ends permanently:

Falling in love with an idiot was my worst and best mistake.

* * *

And thusly, this one-shot comes to a conclusion.

I like B...honestly, a lot more a L. I think it's cause B has more emotion (somewhat) and the initiative to do what he liked, despite him being a serial killer and stuff.

Honestly, i didn't put much detail into this thing. That's because Lucilla's mostly reciting stuff off memory, as if she was telling someone. It's different for me I guess, since I have a tendency nowadays to write an awful lot into a paragraph because I like making things detailed. It's really redundant on some parts, but again, reciting from memory for her. I really would've like to make Lucilla more sarcastic and bitchy in some parts, but decided against it. I guess it's the aftertaste of losing someone you love, causing Lucilla to lose some of that. I know some people end up more bitter, but Lucilla does the opposite. It's mostly cuz she realizes that B's actions were stupid and he deserved it (because he did.)

Well...a sort of happy ending? Although Lucilla...yeah. har...har...har.

Well, onto my OTHER story. IF I ever decide to write it, it would be about Lucille (Rini.) She'll go through the main storyline stuff. I have the story mostly planned out, but it's still a bit iffy. Again, that's only if I ever plan to write it (I have a tendency to want to write it one day, and then not for the next, until I regain a sudden interest.)

Let me know what you think of this one-shot. Thanks...? xD


End file.
